Monday, January 29, 2007

How the Vikings can go 14-2 in 2007

Over the weekend, I devised a way for the Vikings to make major improvements and compete for a Super Bowl championship next year.

Step One: Coax Dan Marino out of retirement

Marino almost signed with the Vikes in '00, but opted for retirement. I think he's still got some game left. Plus, he could throw more TD passes and hold off Brett Favre from breaking his TD record, which would of course please Vegan Viking to no end.

Step Two: Trade a fourth round pick for Randy Moss
Get perhaps the greatest playmaker in franchise history back on the franchise that he belongs on. Imagine Danny Boy hurling lasers out to Randy!

Step Three: Sign Dwight Freeney
The Vikings have a great interior defensive line (Pat Williams and Kevin Williams are both Pro Bowlers), but they have no pass rush off the edge. There's an easy way to get a pass rush--sign Dwight Freeney. He's a liability against the run, but so what? If that doesn't work, the Vikes could:

a. coax Bruce Smith out of retirement
b. resurrect the corpse of Reggie White and sign him to a one-year contract (you don't sign a resurrected corpse to a long-term deal--too many risks).

Step Four: Draft Adrian Peterson
Chester Taylor is fine and all that, but he's not really a big playmaker. On an offense devoid of playmakers, the Vikes need more, and Peterson would provide that. Of course, the Vikes WILL have playmakers once they get Marino and Moss, and Peterson would be great to keep the pressure off a QB nearing 50. It would be the first time Marino played with a competent RB, so that would be great.

If the Vikes are unable to draft Adrian Peterson out of Oklahoma, they should:

a. sign Adrian Peterson from the Bears and tell everybody they drafted Adrian Peterson of Oklahoma.
b. coax Emmitt Smith out of retirement.

Step Five: Hire Bud Grant as Defensive Coordinator
With Mike Tomlin gone, the Vikes have a need: why not go with the greatest Viking coach ever? If he doesn't want to come be the defensive coordinator, you could always make him the head coach and demote Brad Childress to defensive coordinator: after all, if there's anybody in the NFL that knows more about shutting down an offense than Childress, I'd like to see him. But I think Grant would happily be the defensive coordinator. If he won't do it, there are other guys we could ask:

a. Jimmy Johnson
b. Tom Landry
c. Chuck Noll
d. Buddy Ryan

That's it: my five-step plan to make the Vikings an winner in 2007.


  1. Anonymous8:45 AM

    Did you come up with these ideas or did your new baby?

  2. The title of this should be How the Vikings Can Go 14-2 in 1987.

  3. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  4. Anonymous2:36 PM

    so, this is the result of a vegetarian diet...

  5. Anonymous2:38 PM

    The apparant result of a vegetarian diet...

  6. Anonymous4:31 PM

    Stupid is all I can say about such ideas. You want a bunch of dead or old athletes to come play for the vikes, dang ubtard.

  7. Dan Marino?

    You win funniest sports blog of the day. KSK is running scared.

    But it's good to know alcohol is not excluded from a vegan diet.

  8. Okay people, check the author of this post. There are three contributors to this blog now. Vegan Viking (who is the new Father and the Vegan), What was that Bang? (who I do not know for sure) who was the author of the post, and myself Blue Viking Devil.

    As stated above, the post was by What Was That Bang? Not the new father and vegan creator of this blog.

  9. Nice post, I copied the format and did one about the Lions. Check it out:

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